UPJOKE
air pollutionwastesewagecontaminationwater pollutionnoise pollutiondefilementpollutantbefoulmentsootcontaminantcarbon dioxidepollutantsenvironmentenvironmental

I was offered a job as a noise pollution officer...

But I had to turn it down.

What do you call the Kardashian family taking a swim in the ocean?

pollution

Why does Argentina have the least pollution?

Because they have Buenos Aíres

The level of pollution in the world today is becoming intolerable.

Only the other day I opened a can of sardines to find it was full of oil and all the fish were dead.

The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur "Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want to in heaven"...

Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, "I want to hang out with God."
St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and introduced him to God. God recognized Arthur and commented, "Okay, so you were the one who invented the Harley-Davidson motorcycle?"
Arthur said, "Yeah, that's me.....

Air pollution is so low

That my wife is able to see her mistakes

I found a genie in a bottle who granted me three wishes.

Being selfless, I wished for world peace, reduce pollution and less traffic.

...

Should’ve read the terms and conditions. My bad.

Wife-Husband Peaceful Relationship

They asked him why your relationship with your wife is always peaceful and no fight ever?! He replied that is because we agreed since the beginning that she takes decisions in small issues leaving me the big ones. For example, she takes decisions in: What house or car to buy; what school we choose f...

I just thought of this and I can't get it out of my mind.

Teacher: What are the biggest causes of air pollution.

Student: Gases realeased from vehicles like trucks and cars.

Student: Factories that release gases like Co2 from burning fuels.

Student: There are 7 BILLION people living on earth, so there is more than a TRILLION farts rele...

Apparently the USA is the biggest contributor to noise pollution in the world

My solution: put a silencer in every school

How bad is light pollution?

One of Orion's dogs was put down.

Due to less pollution in the air

cloud files are clearly visible now

Call Captain Planet

The residents of a town are fed up with all of the pollution from factories, littering, and toxic waste.

Finally, a townsperson says, "We need Captain Planet!"

A moment later, a superhero looking dude shows up and says, "Did someone summon me?

The townspeople rejoice, an...

Kids

A first grade teacher had twenty-five students in her class and she presented each child in her class the first half of a well known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you....

Pollution levels have come down so drastically

That my wife is now seeing things from my point of view!

What happens when the pollution rises in Los Angeles?

UCLA

Poseidon, Zeus, and Hades sit down for a drink.

They know that, because of those pesky humans, it will be their last meeting in a long time. Zeus is attempting to combat climate change, Poseidon is dealing with rampant pollution and rising sea levels, and Hades needs to update his infrastructure to deal with the massive influx of souls after WW3....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Holmes and Watson go out camping.

Sherlock Holmes and his good friend Dr. Watson decide to make a trip to the countryside and go camping.

In the middle of the night, Sherlock wakes up Watson and asks him:

"John, look up at the sky. What do you see?"

Watson, still sleepy, slowly arranges his thoughts:
"The... ...

Isis sent 8 terrorists to China

A few years ago, ISIS did train eight people for many months before sending them on terrorist missions to China.

The first guy’s target was Beijing’s most complex interchange. He passed out due to motion sickness.

The second guy wanted to blow up a public bus in Shanghai during rush ho...

What do you call it when Kim K. goes to the beach?

Pollution

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