UPJOKE

9 Year Old Jokes

My 9 year old daughter made up this joke. "Why did the bull get fat?"

Because he ate too many cowleries.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a 58 year old man that has sex with a 9 year old girl?

The Prophet Muhammad.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A housewife takes a lover during the day, while her husband is at work. Not aware that 9 year old son was hiding in the closet. Her husband came home unexpectedly, so she hid her lover in the closet. The boy now has company.

Boy: ‟Dark in here.”
Man: ‟Yes it is.”
Boy: ‟I have a baseball.”
Man: ‟That's nice.”
Boy: ‟Want to buy it?”
Man: ‟No, thanks.”
Boy: ‟That's my dad outside.”
Man: ‟How much did you say the baseball was again?”
Boy: ‟$250.”

In the next few weeks, it happ...

My 9 year old son has started asking awkward questions about the human body...

I suppose the freezer wasn't the best place to hide it.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My 9 year old just told me this joke and I thought I would share

What do you call rich peanut butter?

Jif Bezos

Joke from my 9 year old brother- our dad is dead

Who would win in a fight? Our dad or a plate of spaghetti?
The spaghetti because dad PASTAway

*Knock knock* (courtesy of a 9 year old)

Who's there?

I eat map.

I eat map who?

*Queue a disgusted face on my cousin* **YOU EAT YOUR POO!**

(from my 9 year old) What is the scariest planet in Star Wars?

Na-BOO!

My 9 year old told me this one. What is the difference between girl spaghetti and boy spaghetti?

Meatballs.

She's so petite and delicate so it was perfectly hilarious.

My 9 year old son asked "Daddy... why is mummy called Teresa?"

Me: "Oh, well that's easy! You see, your mummy really really, REALLY loves Easter... Teresa is an anagram of Easter, see?"

Using a pen and paper I showed him once more - Easter....Teresa.

Him: "Wow dad that's SO cool! Thanks dad!!"

Me: "Hey, no problem Alan"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm 36, and last night when I was out with my 19 year old girlfriend someone yelled "Paedophile!"

That really ruined our 10 year anniversary.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.